It can be difficult to realize that a family member needs more care in a setting like assisted living. Just as our parents kept us safe and secure when we needed it — there comes a time when we’re called upon to return this same love to our aging family members.
Learn more about the next steps to take when your parents need assisted living.
6 Steps to Take When Your Loved One Needs Assisted Living
Some of us will provide care to our parents or senior loved ones in our own home for a period, but this is not always possible for all families, or always desired by the children or parents themselves. Many families find themselves searching for assisted living, an intermediate level of residential care for seniors who aren’t safe living alone.
Ideally, your parents can be full participants in the search, but when your loved one is impaired by Alzheimer’s disease or dementia, you may have to proactively take more control of the decision making.
If you see that your parents need assisted living, here are some steps that can help you find them the right care:
1. Determine what you can afford.
Like it or not, money is going to be a factor in many families’ searches. Look at what your family can afford on a monthly basis. Look into creative ways to pay for care, like social security or veterans benefits. Some families may have to consider difficult options such as pooling resources from other family members, selling a family home or even cashing-in a life insurance policy.
2. Decide what type of Care home is best for your loved ones needs.
After you have already done a little investigating into what your family can afford, make a decision about what specific type of care home would best fit your loved ones needs. Would independent living suit their needs or do they need a higher level of care, such as an assisted living community? Do they need a home that caters specifically to individuals with dementia or Alzheimer’s? Do they like a small, home-like setting or would they prefer a larger, hotel-type setting? The options are numerous which allows most families to find the ideal care home for their loved one.
3. Go visit an assisted living community.
No amount of time viewing brochures, floor plans, photos or reviews can substitute for an in-person visit to an assisted living community. Schedule visits for you and your loved one several different communities. A good time to tour is during a meal, such as lunch, so potential residents can try the food and get a good sense of the community’s culture; as most of the residents will be out and about during a mealtime. Based on these initial tours, narrow down your search to two or three favorites. Perform follow-up tours, perhaps even unannounced, to get a good sense for the community you and your loved one are considering. Make a connection with the communities’ administrator, coordinator and/or owner and see if your ideas of care and community culture are on
the same wavelength.
4. Include your loved one.
The more involved your loved one is in the search, the better. Of course, you can do much of the legwork for them, but have discussions with them about their desires and preferences and, ideally, present them with a range of options. If your loved one is in denial about his or her need for care, stay strong but understanding. Remember that many individuals resist this change at first and may be angry, frustrated or confused. This is a totally normal reaction to this type of life change. Make sure that you let them know that you empathize with their feelings and that you only want the best for them. Once they move in and get settled into their new lifestyle, most individuals will enjoy their new environment and will be appreciative of your persistence.
5. Prepare to move.
If you’ve come this far in the process, there’s no sense in delaying the move. It’s risky to procrastinate when a loved one needs care, as the delay can lead to avoidable accidents and medical problems. Decide together on what will come with your loved one to their new home and be sensitive to their wants and desires. Bringing their own furniture, décor, photos and other keepsakes can help make the transition much easier. Many assisted living homes are also pet friendly which is wonderful for individuals who have a furry friend that they can bring with them for added comfort and love.
6. Work together towards a decision.
Whether your loved one is choosing the community themselves or whether you need to make that decision for a family member who is impaired by Alzheimer’s or dementia, try to make sure that everyone in your family feels good about the choice. When possible, have conversations with your loved one discussing the pros and cons of each option and try to find consensus about the right decision.
At Pineview Assisted Living, we understand that deciding to move a loved one into an assisted living home can be a very difficult and confusing time. We are here to help guide you through this process by answering any and all questions or concerns that you may have. Know that you are not alone in this process and that we are here to offer you support and quidance during this transitional period.